Could She Be Right?

I know there is such a thing as denial. I think I am pretty in touch with reality most of the time, but I also know that I believe what I want to believe. When it comes to Mia and having CP I am so confused. A couple of weeks ago we met with yet another developmental ped. I thought he was an idiot, but that is not the point. He talked a lot and talked circles. He basically told us stuff that we had already been told, hypotonia, globally delayed, possible CP. But then he went on to prove his idiocy by saying he doesn't understand why the other doctors are beating around the bush and not saying that Mia has CP. He said they are calling it Hypoxic Ischemic Encephalopathy, Hypotonia or low muscle tone instead of calling it what it really is Cerebral Palsy. 

Let me give you some background on why I call him an idiot.  We go to an army hospital which is probably our first problem, the second problem is we live in Hawaii which limits our resources. Mia had an excellent devel. ped. who we loved, he was so great. He was very positive, not unrealistic and he was understanding. He was in the military so he was deployed to Iraq. The next devel. ped. was a civilian doctor filling it at the Army hospital. He was a waste of time. He didn't even do an evaluation on Mia even though he had never seen her before. He just asked us some questions and that was that. I felt very frustrated after that appointment. We were supposed to meet with him again in November 07, but his contract didn't get renewed and the hospital didn't have a devel. ped. I was irate. I demanded to be seen at a civilian hospital with a new devel. ped. well, jokes on me. There is NO DEVELOPMENTAL PEDIATRICIAN on the entire island. So, meanwhile the army is looking for a civilian doctor to come and fill in for them. Which, brings me to the 'idiot'. So, he's an idiot because of some of the things he said, he's an idiot because he didn't even review Mia's files to gain an understanding of her and her progress. Instead he decided to read up on her for the first 25 minutes of our appointment leaving us waiting in the waiting room. This appointment had been scheduled for a month or more before we met with him. He had ample time to review files and gain a better understanding of his patient. So, now that I have ranted about this guy who doesn't stand a chance against me. I am so harsh! Yikes, back off girl! 

My husband asked the doctor why the other doctors would not be calling it CP and referring to it as other things. He started to answer and then realized there was nothing he could say. How can he speculate as to what another doctor was thinking? So, I then asked him what his opinion is (though I thought he was an idiot from the beginning I thought I would entertain myself by asking). He said " I have a very real concern that she has hypotonia cerebral palsy." Ouch! I didn't want to hear that. I came home and read and read and read some more. I just couldn't see where Mia fit into any of the CP categories. Yes, she suffered a brain injury due to going without oxygen. Yes, she is hypotonic. Yes, she is globally delayed. I know all of these things, but she doesn't have any of the other characteristics common with CP. So, I wonder...could I be in denial? Do I not see what Dr. Idiot Sees? Am I really that out of touch with reality? I know that CP has different degrees, different variations, but I also know it is possible to have congenital hypotonia and not have CP. I know that it is possible to have a brain injury and not have CP. I know that you can have CP and the brain may not reveal an injury. 

Since Mia's first MRI I have researched CP. I did a lot in the beginning and then I realized while she was still in the NICU I needed to focus on being with her and not worrying about CP. Several times over the last 18 months I have researched CP and the symptoms of CP. Sometimes I would think it was possible that she had it, other times I was convinced she didn't. About 4-6 months ago I asked her PT if she thought Mia had CP, she said 'No'. I was relieved and agreed with her. Well, today I was talking to her, this is the first time that her and I have talked since Mia met with Dr. Idiot. I told her about the appointment. When I told her about his concerns for Mia and that she has CP she looked at me in complete confusion and disbelief. She said she truly doesn't believe Mia has CP. She said that Mia's global delays are a result of her having Hypotonia, but she is showing great progress. I told her that I think the doctor wanted us to do the MRI because he wants to say "see I told you she has CP'. She highly recommends a second option if he does DX her with CP. So, is a PT qualified enough to know whether or not Mia has CP? Could she be right? I will totally seek a second opinion if he does dx her with CP.